Fear of rejection: A curse or a blessing.

Despite being a Homosapien, we didn’t renounce some of our primitive habits and thinking. Most of the time, we prefer being part of something big that unites us and makes us a pack.

Fear of rejection

If you consider that fear of rejection is something unique to you, I can tell you that every being on earth will stumble upon that feeling in his life. It’s normal behavior to want to be part of something big as we’ve adapted to live in communities that provide shelter, security, and food, Thus, it guarantees our survival. Now, to understand the question in the title, we must first learn how this feeling impacts our lives and what can we do about it.

Firstly, the fear of rejection pushes us to secure our relationships by investing more time and energy in them, it encourages us to follow the herd and make sure we’re aligned with the common vision and principles. This can sometimes halt our progress, thus, it can be the only thing standing in our way toward achieving our goals.

Secondly, this feeling challenges us and gets us from our comfort zone so we can decide either to continue on the current road or take another path. While this can be frustrating for some, it is necessary for the long run as it is a rare opportunity that can change our lives dramatically.

Finally, being rejected from a pack usually means we are alone and we lost all support, and this makes it harder for us to embrace and learn. We tend to focus on what we think we know we can achieve, while we know we can’t see the whole picture from a single perspective. Having a single point of view makes it easier for the fear to dominate us and make us feel weak and hopeless.

We cannot know if it’s a curse or a blessing unless we try, but I can assure you that if you have doubts you already know the answer. Never be afraid of the jump and be willing to throw it all if you think it’s the best thing to do.

If you’re afraid of people speaking in a bad way about you and gossiping, you must know that they will do it either way. Unfortunately, “parasites” will continue to live as long as there is a success. Let them gossip, let them speak their minds, let them do whatever they can do, play the game, and don’t worry about your fame, as long as you don’t give a damn, they’ll always be lame and you can’t do anything about it, just watch and let time do its magic.

Some people will always use that trick to make you feel bad and panic but remember you can’t give in, they’ll just keep coming back to you to make sure you’re not better than them, so make them worry more and kill them with your success.

If I didn’t answer the question directly, it's because the fear of rejection is a double-edged sword, depending on the situation it can shift from being a curse to a blessing.

Don’t lower your expectations to fit into the world, there is a place for everyone, if you feel it’s not yours, then what are you waiting for? Go out there and find it!

.NET Developer/Junior DevOps/Junior CTO/Experienced C# developer (https://www.linkedin.com/in/arsslen-idadi)

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